You know you 're from Thessaloniki when...
You start your day with 'bougatsa' and chocolate milk.
It takes you 5 hours to drink one so-called 'instant' coffee.
You go out in the evenings even on weekdays, and it 's unthinkable to miss Saturday night out.
You end your evening out with a 'patsas'.
On your birthday you get a 'bougatsa' with little candles on.
January 1st is the day of the 'bougatsa with the coin inside'.
You know the secret ingredient of 'taouk yoksou' but you won't tell your Athenian friends until after they 've tried.
Every word with the letter L inside betrays your origin: «Χαλλλαρά, φιλλλλαράκι»...
You experience mood swings depending on the performance of Aris, PAOK, and Iraklis.
You often have arguments with southerners regarding the use of genitive or accusative for the indirect object of some verbs. «Θα σε κανώ κεφτέδες, βρε»! (Actually, in ancient Greek you would use two accusatives for this one: It 's «ποιῶ τινά τί», so STFU.)
Athens is a country north of Libya.
The Metro is a legend for you, much like the bridge of Arta.
You know the difference between a 'souvlaki' and a 'kalamaki'. Similarly, you know what a «γύρος-λαγάνα με πάπρικα-μπούκοβο» is.
You never have to set an appointment place when you 're about to meet some friends. You know it's Kamara.
'Frappé' coffee is an ancient-Greek-Orthodox invention that the rest of the world should be grateful for.
You find it difficult to live in a place where the horizon isn't met by the sea.
Your affirmative is «ναι για»!
Your negative is «γιοκ».
You think that you live in the most beautiful city in the world.
You think that the best beaches on Earth are in Chalkidiki .
You can always appreciate the joy of having a drink on a night out with some dear, old and true friends that never let you down and never forget you, no matter what place life has thrown you to.
The people you talk to look at you straight in the eyes.
You are sure that you have seen the most beautiful sunset from the port of your city.
You walk by the sea near the White Tower holding hands with your loved one.
You start off to the university in the morning but instead of that you end up in a café with your friends.
You end your statments with 'afou': «Σαν τη Χαλκιδική δεν έχει, αφού»!
You know that the expression 'klain main' ain't German.
You are able to walk through the streets of Athonos in less than 60 seconds, while the rest of the suckers won't go past the restaurant owners.
During all times of day, you always find a 'moment' for a cup of coffee.
Your day starts with your morning cup of coffee (always at noon), then for a little ouzo in Athonos, then ouzo becomes shots in some bar, then you end up at the 'bouzoukia', and finally you buy bougatsa and milk and go to bed in the morning.
It takes your girlfriend about two hours to dress up and put on some make up just to go out and get a newspaper.
Everything with a triangular shape is edible, as long as it's from 'Elenidis' (σ.σ . τρίγωνα Πανοράματος
Dinner reservations are always made after 10 pm.
Words like 'demek' and 'kagouras' are part of your verbal arsenal.
You write 'Thessaloniki' with double S but pronounce it with double L.
You know that there are bougatsa fillings other than custard.
It's more likely that you 're looking for a taxi ride at 4 am rather than midnight.
You insist on calling the streets 'Antheon' and 'Nea Egnatia' instead of 'Papandreou' and 'Karamanli'.
You set up an appointment with your friends at 8 pm and the first one arrives at 8:30.
Just to be on the safe side, you double-check if PAOK, Aris or Iraklis are playing before getting into the city traffic.
You go to any restaurant and expect the desserts and fruit to be free of charge.
Alternatively, breakfast is a koulouri from the guy on the corner of Tsimiski & Aristotelous.
=== Glossary & survival guide ===
(Provided as-is, no warranty given or implied)
σουβλάκι (souvláki) = meat chunks on a skewer, grilled (Athenian: καλαμάκι, kalamaki).
καλαμάκι (kalamáki) = plastic drinking straw.
μπουγάτσα (bougátsa) = a kind of pie where the filling is wrapped into phyllo pastry. The most common filling is custard, and this variety is called γλυκιά (glykiá, 'sweet') μπουγάτσα. If the filling is cheese, then it's called αλμυρή (almirí, 'salty') μπουγάτσα.
τσουρέκι (tsouréki) = Braided, leavened, sweet bread with eggs, similar to the Turkish 'çörek' and the Jewish 'challah'. The Greek version is usually made to celebrate Easter, and it 's flavored with 3 magic spices: Cardamom, mahlab and mastic.
φραπέ (frappé) = instant cold coffee, usually made in a shaker. Invented accidentaly by Yannis Dritsas, a Nestlé representative, in the 1957 International Trade Fair. 'Freddo' and 'Frappuccino' are poor frappé imitations.
καρτόφια (kartófia) = (from Russian, through Pontic) potatoes. Keep this in mind just in case, though it's recommended that you use πατάτες (patátes) instead.
πορτς (ports) = (from Russian 'borshch' or Yiddish 'borscht') Pontic vegetable soup of East-European origin.
τεμέτερον (teméteron) = (from Pontic 'our own') Pontic Greek
καρντάσης (kardásis) = (from Turkish 'kardeş', sibling, through Pontic) (1) mate, buddy (2) brother
πατσάς (patsás) = tripe soup, supposedly tasting better than it smells...
πάπρικα (páprika) = 'ayvar', red pepper spread/dip popular in the Balkans. The Greek version is usually mild in flavor. In Thessaloniki it often replaces tzatziki in 'pita-gyros'.
μπούκοβο (boúkovo) = a kind of red pepper, used often in πατσάς or as rocket fuel.
καζάν ντιμπί (kazán dibí) = ('pot's bottom' in Turkish) a pudding based on rice flour and buffalo milk, flavored with rosewater. Thessaloniki's most popular dessert. (If only we had enough buffaloes...)
ταούκ γιοκσού (taoúk yoksoú) = (Turkish 'tavuk göğsü') very much like καζάν ντιμπί, but with a secret ingredient...
«θα σε στείλω πακέτο» (tha se stílo pakéto) = 'Ι 'm gonna send you a packet'. In Athenian, however, this means 'I'm gonna send you AS a package', in other words, 'get ready for the trip of your life'!
κλάιν μάιν (kláin máin) = (origin unknown) 'I don't care' or 'bullshit'. Don't confuse with German 'klein mein', Thessalonians ooze self-confidence.
κάγκουρας (kángouras) = (origin unknown) the Greek version of 'chav'. Don't confuse with southern hemisphere marsupials.
μαλάκας (malákas) = The most used and most controversial of all Greek words, commonly heard in vocative («ρε μαλάκα!»). Literally 'wanker', in practice it may mean anything from 'buddy' to 'asshole', and of course 'wanker'. Use at your own risk!
ντεμέκ (demék) = (1) adv. 'pretentiously' (2) adj. 'pretentious', 'poser'. In both cases same as 'δήθεν' (dhithén).
πάνε (páne) = (1) indicative 'they go' (2) imperative 'go!'. The latter does not occur in Athenian.
όζα (óza) = nail polish (Athenian: μανό, manó)
κουλούρι (kouloúri) = circular bread with sesame seeds on top, usually sold by street vendors. Known in Turkey as 'simit' and in Serbia as 'đevrek'.